The Eclectic Quill

July 21, 2008

A Timetable by Any Other Name is Still a #$@* Timetable!

Filed under: Uncategorized — Kelly @ 4:22 pm

You know, I try to stay reasonable and not get overly emotive. I try to count to ten and take deep breaths. I try to keep my arguments to logic and sound reasoning. Yet there are still certain moments, certain times every election year that I have my serious WTF moments. Moments where I just can’t believe my frigging ears and want to go on a tirade that makes the earth shake. This is one of those moments. How in the wide wide world of sports are you supposed to tell me that a "time horizon" is something different than a "timetable?" It’s like saying "that’s not a car, it’s an automobile.

Obama has said they need to set a timetable for withdrawing from Iraq, and McCain has repeatedly criticized him for it. Now, after all of the hoopla about not being constrained to some sort of "arbitrary timetable" they want to talk about a "time horizon." This has got to be a joke right? Somehow the Ashton Kutcher has gotten the entire media in on this and I’m being Punk’d right? I mean no one is seriously trying to suggest that a "horizon" is different from a "time table?"

I mean seriously, who ever heard of a "time horizon" anyway? What did they do, sit around in a room spit-balling terms trying to invent a new synonym so they could claim it wasn’t? How many new words were junked before they came up with "horizon." Time target? Time goal? Time plateau? No, that’s all too close, gotta come up with something even more weird, more outlandish, more utterly frigging identical yet completely meaningless. "I know," yelps a newly promoted term inventor, "TIME HORIZON!"

"Yes!" all the neocon term inventers scream jumping up and down, minds scurrying to try and parse the difference between "horizon" and "timetable." The only thing is that the more they define it the more it sounds exactly the @#$% what Obama is talking about! You see, the part that really gets my undies bunched about all of this is the flack they’ve been trying to give Obama over this and how he recently used the word "refined." He wants to set a timetable for withdraw, a timetable which might be refined based on what the Generals on the ground have to say. On the other hand what the Republicans are talking about is setting a time horizon for withdraw, which might be refined based on what the Generals on the ground have to say. Furthermore the part of the story that the mainstream media is ignoring here is that al-Maliki’s statement wasn’t so much saying that he endorsed Obama, ` but that his timetable was `the right timeframe for a withdrawal, with the possibility of slight changes.” Is it just me or does "slight changes" sound like exactly the same @#$% thing as "refine?

It’s enough to make you want to scream and bang your head against a wall. No matter how obvious something is the media has to try and make it sound "objective." So while McCain’s camp is sitting there, on the one hand tyring to convince us  that what walks like a duck, quacks like a duck, and looks like a duck is really just a "water-fowl horizon" (and actually has legitimate news sources repeating this crap) on the other hand  they’re telling the media that it’s not being fair in its coverage. (Excuse me for a moment while I go punch my Bozo Bag for a while…. ….whew, that helped. Well it helped me not throw my laptop across the room anyway.) Not FAIR in its coverage. You’re sitting there trying to feed me a bucket of excrement through the media and now you want to convince me they need to add cinnamon?!!?!?!? Seriously, where is Ashton? Come out! I know you’re there!

And then I get to the point that really set me off and made me just have to write this entry. "Back in the U.S., Republican rival John McCain said he hoped Obama’s visit would open his eyes to the danger of withdrawal timetables. Said the Arizona senator, who was meeting with President Bush’s father, the former president, in Maine: "When you win wars, troops come home." He said of Obama: "He’s been completely wrong on the issue." Exactly what does that mean? Should Obama realize from his trip that he was right on the @#$% money they entire time? And what the hell do you mean when the war is won the troops come home. Why has the media given him such a whole scale pass on this thing? McCain on the one hand keeps saying that we won the war, that the surge worked, and so on and so forth. By his logic, if that’s true, from this quote it’s time to set a fricking timetable to bring the troops home. But NOOOOOOOOO if you dare to suggest that then you’re "admitting defeat." How can we admit defeat if we already won? ARRRGGGHHHH!!! Where’s the clown?!?!?!

And then the icing on the cake is that Obama, who has been perfectly consistent the entire time, they label as a flip=flopping on this subject. Meanwhile McCain who thinks we won but haven’t won, and who thinks that we should pull out when Iraq wants us to until they want us to, and who thinks that we need to establish democracy over there, but dismisses the desire to pull out as a maneuver to appeal to the electorate (read democracy) is never called on flip flopping. How can you be wrong about anything when you’re allowed to take every side of the issue without being called on it. The media needs to realize that a ref isn’t being fair by making sure they call equal numbers of fouls on both teams, but by calling a foul when one is committed, and there’s a lot of fouls not getting called on McCain here.

The bottom line is that the only consistent position here has been Obama’s. He was against the surge because he said it would detract from Afghanistan and he was right about that. He was for a timetable and he was right on its general scale. He was right on negotiating with Iran. He has been right on every issue that McCain has been criticizing him on and it’s high time for the media to start holding McCain accountable to the truth. Now excuse, me I have some more aggression I need to go work out on Bozo.

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1 Comment »

  1. Very passionate work.

    Comment by Ryan — July 22, 2008 @ 7:28 am | Reply


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